Sticks in a bundle are unbreakable – Bondai People Proverb
Recently I sat with a sweet friend who began to share some of her life story with me. I wept as the horrific details spilled out. It was more than I could almost fathom as she shared of her childhood and the shattered life she had endured and somehow miraculously survived. Her tween and teen years were saturated with ongoing abuse and pain. I felt like vomiting as I listened to her share. My heart broke for her. For many nights after I could not sleep just reliving what she had shared.
I first met her many years ago. She stepped into my circle when we both had babies, when her family began to attend my church. I remember meeting her and distinctly remember enjoying her sweet, kind personality. What I did not know, is the horrid things that were happening to her inside what should have been safe and welcoming walls of that church. It was not what Jesus called us his bride, the church, to be – a hospital for the sick.
People who had no idea of the magnitude of her trauma constantly taunted and belittled her, driving the lies of the enemy deeper into her soul. The words “you don’t belong here” were physically spoken to her in multiple situations.
I can not fathom what prompted such a response from people professing to love and follow Jesus. It made and continues to make me angry. I know the people behind some of those comments and I want to walk up and shake and scold them. I know we are human and make mistakes. But when are we as the church of Jesus going to come together and be what HE called us to be?
The enemy of our souls is absolutely delighted when he sees these kinds of stories unfolding. He wants more than ever to keep each of us bound up in the lies we begin to believe, thinking there is no place we really belong. Truth is, we don’t really belong here. But while our home is heaven, we are called to be a body of believers (a place of belonging) here who binds up the wounds of others, encourages one another and walks in true holiness like Jesus with skin on.
Recently some personal events in my life, sent me on a spiral to a deep pit of discouragement which I did not like to be stuck in. The voices in my head tormented me with the lies of the evil one convincing me that I did not really have a place or group where I really belonged.
Realizing this was not a place I wanted to stay, I reached up and out and through a series of events, God has connected me in some pretty amazing ways to people who struggled along side me and helped me crawl up out of that dark place. He also brought resources like my pretty much all time favorite book, “Find Your People” by Jeannie Allen and somehow surrounded me with a magnificent army of prayer warriors who pray me through anything.
I still struggle with darkness at times. I think we all do if we are honest. The battle is real and continues to rage until we get to heaven! I know now who my people are and where I belong. Do I still have ugly bouts of insecurity? Yup! But I am finding more confidence and help in refuting the enemies’ lies with God’s truths!
And, I am placing myself on active duty in the war against hurt and pain that happens inside God’s hospital for the sick. As I continue to think and pray about this issue, the question that keeps popping up is this: What if we as a church greeted people with “Let me hear your story…” instead of shooting those evil, self righteous, nauseating to the heart of God, arrows of ” You don’t belong here…” What if instead of looking down our noses at people who are different from us, we embraced them as the beautiful creations of God that they are and made every effort to walk with them in their messy pain and trauma.
We are all messy. We all face defeat and discouragement but as members of God’s family we do have a place where we are known and loved and where we really do belong!